Endless, isn't it!?

"Don't lose hope when you're forlorn, just keep your eyes upon the skies, every night a star is born. Just remember in the darkest hour, within your heart's the power for making you… a hero too."

-- Lyrics by David Zippel, A Star Is Born


Now, why must I bleed this thing dry?
What makes me do this to myself?
Over, and over again.
The endless saga of a fairytale.
It's a load of shite!
I am so angry at myself for doing this.
It's like the disease that won't go away.
The things I live with..
The time bomb inside me waiting to explode.
The memories that I am consumed with every moment.
The eggshell I feel that is caving in on me minute after minute.
This so-called, private diary of mine is turning into public viewing auction..
50 thoughts a minute,
100 words waiting to be blurted out,
Going once,
Going twice.
Yes, I feel like I'm gone.
Going to the places in my mind that, I once knew.
Why?
Medication?
No!
That would be the easy answer now, wouldn't it?
Because, it makes me feel better.
It makes me feel good, when I tell the truth about, these things which plague me and amaze me.
I find it easier to express myself in this way
We all want to be known.
We all need to be heard, do we not!?
I wish that i had something else to focus on
let me go to my creative side and hide from the crap and the lies of this world for a while
how about forever
then no one can ever hurt me
no one can get to me in my solitary space
These things belong to the Shazzy, and everyone else can F*** off, if they don't understand.
I'm not here to explain myself.
I am here to just be, and I will be all I can be.
So, don't try to turn me into something I am not, cause I am on maximum 'Shazzy' overdrive.
And, I won't stop till I have done the things I came here to do.
Got a problem with that!?
I didn't think so!!!! ;) Grrrrrrrr......!

Boo..Umm's eh Robbie!!! (Inside thang with my bro and I.)